You’re now making a positive step toward enhancing your relationship, just by learning more about effective ways to help couples.
Happy, long-lasting relationships are developed over time. You can learn to express your needs, be creative & kind when you disagree, and become more playful and erotic in your relationship. And when you need help, know what constitutes a real effective helper. You'll be in the best place to make the right decision for you and your loved one.
My Team calls me "Dr. K."
If you’d like to learn more about my personal relationship journey please go here. I'm the founder and president of Couples Therapy Inc. My own relationship challenges drove me to create a format to help troubled couples that's easier, more successful, and more powerful than a weekly program. We now see couples in an intensive format, or online from across the globe in the comfort of their own homes.
Even if you're powerful in the rest of your life, when you are broken-hearted, you feel wounded and adrift. That's a normal reaction.
You may act icy cold to keep your partner or the pain at bay. Or solicitous but anxious, and the nervousness shows. Or maybe irritability and annoyance is dominant.
You can learn to manage that.
Having too many dumb fights followed by long silences? Who has time for that. You've got a lot going on. You're juggling a full life. And these fights take up precious time and energy. Even vacations are starting to get ruined with: "You just had to say that, didn't you?"
You can establish priorities, learn new ways to relate and slow down. Vacations can be fun again.
When our committed relationships have re-connected, kissing is easy. We hug with full tenderness and feeling.
We feel whole again. Let's make it happen.
We're told that to be an adult means being independent and self-sufficient.
Maybe you've believed that. But we all know the true joy of a contented embrace. We know that love means to open ourselves up to one another and share our deepest thoughts and feelings. To Give freely and to allow ourselves to feel passionate and free again. To develop a erotic friendship that is irreplaceable.
"It means taking full responsibility for our love lives...to tolerate and value close relationships with our lovers, friends, and the "inner circle." When we can accept our vulnerability, we become fully alive again. Our most human desires often conflict: the need for safety and love, and the desire to satisfy our curiosity and seek novelty."
Couples Therapy Inc. has 24 clinicians and spans over 19 time zones and nine languages are now spoken here. We have an incredible "dream team" of some of the most highly-trained credentialed couples therapists in the world. But we not only have to be motivated couples therapist, we have to be kind and thoughtful people to join. Our team has to yearn for professional connections with other high-achievers like themselves and have a never-ending passion for excellence.
Our team effort allows us to refine our skills in the never-ending process of providing better expert couples therapy this year than we did last year...to couples anywhere on this planet! We come together, as a team, to share cutting-edge knowledge and elevate our collective level of expertise.
That directly benefits you.
Ours is a lens that studies loving connection, bonding and how those bonds get broken and mended. We see people not as a collection of individuals, but as a network of families and friends. Collectively, we too, represent a connected network. Each of us form a broad tapestry of ages, ethnicities, cultures, language, and knowledge, but we all share a passion for working with couples.
Be sure to read our Personal Statements on our Team Page to learn more about each of us.
We took over the Topside Inn (literally. Every room...) overlooking the spectacular Boothbay Harbor in Maine. We'd recommend it to any of our couples wanting an escape. Nothing forms a team more powerfully than time away, a spectacular view, delicious food, and marvelous companionship. Mixing business with pleasure was the order of the day over this Thursday-Sunday event. The topic: "How Do We Push the Field of Couples Therapy Forward?" Here are some candid shots below:
Our thanks to Max for traveling for the photo shoot.
As a Team, we meet once a month by video-conferencing. We make clinical presentations to each other, and design psycho-educational materials we make available to the general public. We're also in the process of formulating research papers for the therapeutic community focused on the dimensions of love and marriage as seen from the clinical lens of intensive and online work. With over 500 years of collective know-how, and an international perspective, our colleagueship helps us to move the field forward, one couple at a time. And we're a proud part of that growing body of work. We've assembled a lively and eclectic team which can vigorously disagree with one another, while maintaining respect and admiration (a goal we hold dear for couples...).
All from a scientific perspective.
We see our work as a continuous process of ongoing clinical practice, consultation and research, publishing, professional presentations, and then more clinical practice! We enjoy sharing our own discoveries in clinical interventions and practices.
Our mission is to educate, as well as heal. Our goal is to provide education to you about couples therapy itself.
Our clients are driven, successful people, like ourselves. We believe that if you, the most powerful among us learn what good science-based therapy is, you'll demand change. The level of formalized training our colleagues consider "adequate" to do what passes for couples therapy today is neither optimal nor even enough.
The good news is that this is slowly changing, thanks to the tireless efforts of well-recognized training institutes like The Gottman Institute (where our own Dr. Wolfe, Dr. McNulty, Stacy Hubbard, Lisa Lund and Rev. Ramsey have trained therapists) and The International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy, (where Dr. Marni supervises clinicians) as well as lesser known training institutes like the Midwest's The Doherty Institute (training open to all of our Team members) or California's Couples Institute in Menlo Park.
Like myself, many of you have received poor quality couples therapy and quit, believing it was your relationship that failed, not the therapist.
Let that no longer be the case in 2019.
We provide a lot of information on this website, both inside these pages and on our blog. The website changes frequently. It's an evolving labor of love. Please bear with us if something doesn't look quite right. We'll get to it... Or let us know using the link on the bottom left. We'll send you a nice card if you give us your address as a 'thank you.'
Our blog has a science-of-relationships focus, and Daniel Dashnaw, MA, MFT is the Editor. Take advantage of learning about science-based clinical work with couples.
Know what qualifications you're searching for. And then find the absolute best qualified professionals you can, given your financial wherewithal.
It's a wise investment.
It matters to the survival and growth of your most precious adult relationship: your lover, your friend, your spouse.
I want to share the lessons I've learned from searching for qualified couples therapists for this practice and finding very few. I want to help you to find a qualified expert. I want you to demand skilled, science-based couples therapy professionals closest to home.
But if you can't, I invite you to attend one of our intensive couples therapy retreats. It's not a group experience. It is an organized clinical offering, just like our Online Couples Therapy, that gives you a thorough look at your marital dynamics and what needs to change.
We'll even help you to find a skilled professional you can continue with at home, and consult with them to 'bring them up to speed' at no charge to you. It's a fabulous jumpstart! Or, if we're legally allowed to do so in your state, we'll do clinical follow-ups online as well. We're even soon to launch an innovative program called "Fabulous Spouse" to be of continued support to our clients during their ongoing healing and skills-building process.
Dinners are happier times, bedtimes are calm and tender. Your children relax. Even a movie is an excuse to just sit cuddling on the couch. And what about the years you've spent together.
Maybe you haven't been really emotionally connected in a while. It could be that a crisis has sent you both reeling. An illness; a financial setback. Even a regrettable incident, like an affair, that has left one or both of you feeling deeply hurt.
Did you feel taken for granted when your partner made their mark on the world and now you aren't generous?
Or maybe your sexual relationship has become lackluster. Both of you seem too often "tired" or listless when you make love. The love is there, just not the same level of enthusiasm. Enriching a marriage is like vitamins that enrich your body. It keeps both of you sharp and on your toes about what's truly important in life. It's part of the power of teamwork, pulling together to produce great results, just like a well-functioning marriage. We're well-trained, and devoted to helping your marriage work better.
...no matter how distant or angry you've become. And you can 'jump start' that healing process by committing to a single weekend of intensive couples therapy. Learn how to reconnect, face into the wounding, and change around your most painful and destructive patterns. It's private and effective. And you'll learn what to focus on and what is a derivative of the more important stuff.
I want you to be a wise consumer as you seek out couples therapy. Know what to look for in seeking professional help for your relationship.
We've produced a comprehensive Definitive Guide to Couples Therapy retreats, we will send it to you for FREE when you sign up for our email series.
BOSTON • WASHINGTON DC • CHICAGO • THE BAY AREA • LOS ANGELES & ORANGE COUNTY • HOUSTON • AUSTIN • KANSAS CITY • LAS VEGAS • CHARLESTON • GREATER VANCOUVER • ASHLAND, OR • ATLANTA • ALABAMA • MINNEAPOLIS • THE BERKSHIRES/AMHERST/NORTHAMPTON • BOCA RATON • SAN JUAN • MISSOULA, MT • DUBLIN, IE • BRISBANE, AU • HERMANUS, ZA
NEXT: Read 10 Facts About Our Clients and Company