Category Archives for Marital Troubles

Relationship Deficits and Schema

Relationship Deficits arise from issues or schemas. Here are a list of the schemas and their corresponding relationship deficits: Abandonment/Instability: A high score here may indicate an affect dysregulation

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Domestic Violence 101

Domestic Violence 101 Domestic Violence? Me? By now you’ve figured out that you are in an abusive relationship. And you’re begging for any sign that your partner can snap out of it. You stick

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How to Bicker with Skill

How To Bicker With Skill Do you know how to bicker with skill? With all this science-based couples therapy floating around, good marital bickering is becoming a lost art. That’s really unfortunate

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The Problem of Contempt in Couples Therapy

Contempt is the Worst of the Four Horsemen In previous posts, I have elaborated on four marital behaviors that John Gottman describes with the biblical metaphor, the Four Horsemen. They are Criticism,

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Gottman Research Describes 5 Kinds of Couples

Gottman’s Research…Which Couple are You? Dr. John Gottman has been conducted research on couples for over 40 years. As a result of Gottman’s research in the love lab, he has categorized

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What the Research says About How Marriages Fail

Research on Why Marriages Fail John Gottman’s Why Marriages Succeed or Fail is one of Dr. John Gottman’s most accessible and relevant works written for a general audience. It remains one of

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12 Lies About Marriage That May Surprise You

1. Marriage is about Love. It’s Not a Legal Document. Ok. At Couples Therapy Inc. we like love too. But of all these 12 lies about marriage, this one, in particular, needs a second look. This is

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The Unfortunate Secret of the Wealthy Divorcee

Divorce doesn’t knock us all down. But research reveals a growing gender gap in remarriage rates for the wealthy divorced. A recent study of over 5000 wealthy divorced men and women showed that

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Cobra Husbands

Cobra Husbands There are two distinct types of men who physically and emotionally abuse their wives. According to Neil Jacobson, Ph.D. and John Gottman, Ph.D., authors of the book, When Men Batter Women

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Pitbull Husbands

Pitbull Husbands In their seminal work on domestic violence, “When Men Batter Women, New Insights into Ending Abusive Relationships.” Drs. John Gottman and Neil Jacobson defined battering as “physical

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