Is Your Boyfriend Still on Dating Apps? What It Means and How to Respond
Dear Dr. K,
Do you think it’s right for your live-in boyfriend to have a dating site on his phone?
App-rehensive Girlfriend
Dear App-rehensive Girlfriend,
If this happened to you, you’ve just been given a gift.
If you thought you were in a committed relationship, you aren’t. You don’t have to fight about it. You don’t have to argue for the “goodness” of a relationship.
Your partner has told you that “you aren’t the one,” but he’s still looking for “Ms. Right.”
You can choose to stay on those terms. If you are curious, you might ask him to sign in to see when he was last on it.
I'm a licensed psychologist, Gottman-certified therapist, and member of the American Psychological Association with over 30 years of experience helping couples build stronger relationships. Listed in the National Register of Health Service Psychologists, my extensive background includes decades as an AASECT sex therapist, bringing depth to my work with couples navigating intimacy challenges. I specialize in neurodiversity and emotional intelligence - areas where couples need practical, real-world solutions rather than textbook answers.
As the former Program Director of Counseling Psychology at Antioch University New England and a licensed psychologist in MA, AZ, CA, and FL, I bring both academic depth and clinical wisdom to my writing. But what really matters? Making relationship insights accessible and practical for couples ready to grow stronger together.
