Hi, I'm Dr K. Our couples counselors and doctoral psychologists provide science-based help for troubled marriages. A single weekend can transform your relationship.
These findings span 40+ years of research with over 3,000 couples. They've taught us remarkable things...like a predictable pattern of marital decline. We'll motivate you to take action, focus on what's wrong, and show you how to change it FAST. It's personally tailored to just you two. It makes a huge difference to the way you love.
Not all "couples retreats" are the same! Some teach you general information in large groups. Others focus on religious principles. Some are held in exotic places led by people with no credentials as all! And almost none do assessment before you come. They only learn about you while you're there!
Here's how we do it: We think it's more respectful to get a lot of information from you before you come. Then, our skilled couples therapists can score and interpret your every word to know what to ask when they see you.
Have you made plans to leave, consulted an attorney, or even filed for divorce? If you keep hoping that maybe “one last shot” of couples therapy with someone who knows what they've doing might make a difference, you're right. It really could.
If you're asking yourself: "Could we work again with the right therapist?" the answer is a resounding "YES!"
We see it all the time. We work with hostile couples, ones that keep separate bedrooms, have moved out, or have stopped talking to one another. Marriages with little babies or grown children. Even newlyweds, engaged couples or those with no intention of ever getting married. Sometimes our clients are approaching retirement, but can't take it anymore... If nothing changes, they aren't prepared to stay unhappy like this 'until death do us part.'
The severity of your problems don't predict divorce. No matter how bad it is, you can be happily marriage again, according to the research. The marital endurance ethic plays a big role. These are couples who stubbornly outlast their problems. Five years later, many sources of conflict and distress have eased.
One wife agreed to come to the Couples Retreat only after I promised not to 'push her into staying' in her marriage. They had been to over 4 couples counselors in the past 18 years, and none of them had helped.
Family and friends told them they just weren't "suited for each other." (...of course HIS friends sided with him, and HER friends sided with her...)
But everyone agreed: "You two should divorce!" (...except their kids...)
They were in Divorce Mediation when they arrived. I told her "You should really know how to stand up to him, or you probably shouldn't be in mediation." So her goal for the couples retreat was to learn to stand up to a man who she described as "a big bully."
The husband, on the other hand, was really shaken to the core when he arrived. Like many powerful and successful men he had no idea why she left, except that they couldn't stop fighting. He had his complains about her, but his biggest goal was to just fix it. He wanted his wife to come home and he wanted to stop the endless battles.
In their State of the Union Assessment they told me their early love story. It was full of trials and tribulation, like most of our couples. But it also was full of passion! These two were survivors, personally, and as a couple. Horrors of ex's, financial setbacks, kids' problems, you name it...and through it all, they had stayed together...until now.
Their previous therapists would listen and try to give them advice. But no one had taught them how to act differently or why: "Here's what you are doing, and if you keep doing it, the science says that it will be hard to exit this divorce highway. Let's work on how to change things around..."
It's more than a year later, and The Bully and the Bride who were "doomed to divorce" are happy together again. She moved back in, and is delighted to be there. Their family and friends don't talk badly about their spouse anymore, because they don't allow it! They're a team. And they still do have fights. A fair number of them.
Both know how to fight without escalating it. She sets limits. He accepts influence. They work collaboratively because they know what they are doing and why when they disagree. And now it doesn't get out of control.
Or you can condense that time into a single intensive marriage retreat week-end. Like The Bully & The Bride, we'll start with a thorough assessment we call a "State of the Union." It's done online and then in person. It will take you hours to complete. We will give you the "the good, the bad, and the ugly" news about your relationship.
It's expensive because it works.
Their job is to help you end it. Ours is to help you mend it.
Most relationships can go in either direction when they are in trouble. Are you ready to mend it with the help of an expert?
In one prominent study, 66% of currently divorced couples answered "Yes" to the question:
"Looking back, do you wish you and your ex-spouse had tried harder to work through your differences?"
Only 25% of divorcing couples seek out professional help of any kind to rescue their relationship. The ones that do, go an average of only 4 sessions. Even worse, it's most likely that they saw an "All Purpose Therapist" for a 50 minute session...just long enough to start a fight, but not enough time to move through it.
That's not evidence-based treatment...
We're a group of the best trained couples therapists across the USA (..and in Europe, too.)
Our passion is helping couples.
Our Maryland / DC clinician, Angela Voegele is top in her field, and speaks three languages.
We totally immerse ourselves in understanding you and your relationship in this couples retreat. We feel it is more respectful to thoroughly understand you both, before we intervene. And our powerful credentials let you know we really get it.
Our couples therapists have written for professional journals, books, or articles for the general public. Three of us have run graduate programs...and our couples therapist in Maryland carries the rare distinction of "Gottman Certified Couples Therapist" AND Sex Therapist.
Angela Voegele, M.S.W. is one of our most popular Couples Therapists. She enjoys the rare distinction of being one of a handful of professionals worldwide who is both a Gottman Certified Couples Therapist and a Board-Certified Sex Therapist. In addition to English, she is fluent in German and conversational in French. Her couples rave about her results. See the testimonials below.
"Angela was a wonderful therapist and truly advocated for both of us, and our relationship, throughout the weekend intensive. Her approach was thoughtful, logical and easy to follow. She listened to our concerns and organized the weekend in a meaningful way to cover many of our needs. The feedback she provided was constructive and professional. I really feel a great sense of relief after our weekend with Angela. The follow up work and reading she gave us provides the framework we need to continue the work on our own.
I would definitely recommend Angela to others looking for couples counseling.
We thought it might be nice for you to get some feedback on our couples retreat with Angela. Both my husband and I thought she was excellent. We have seen numerous therapist over the last three years and you have by far exceeded all of our expectations. I got there on Friday with a lot of anger over our situation. By the time we left Sunday afternoon I felt free.
Our therapist had a very nice way of not taking sides yet giving good strong comments and thought-provoking scenarios. She absolutely knew us when we got there and often referred to our history. She was extraordinarily easy to talk to and also has a nice sense of humor.
She gave us practical tools to use when I was very upset and we left with a new vision of our future and tools to use to improve our communication.
I was skeptical heading into the weekend but now I am so glad that we did it.”
I am writing to express my/our deep appreciation for our work with our therapist at Couples Therapy Inc. We are a married couple of 24 years, and have been actively considering divorce for the past several months. As a last ditch effort, we let go of our previous marriage therapist and began working with you, first in 3 sessions online, and then in an intensive. Our therapist has been an extraordinary support for both of us. Her style is both structured and flexible. I appreciated that she listened exceedingly well. She brings evidence-based research into the mix. Perhaps most of all, she is optimistic, thought not in an unrealistic way. She has been instrumental in helping us develop new patterns of communication and engagement.
We are very, very grateful.
Choose highly trained specialists with demonstrated Couples Therapy Skills.
Save time by completing "The BIG BIG Book" Online Assessment.
Gain a thorough understanding of your destructive patterns...
One of 200 Gottman Certified Couples Therapist,
Board Certified Sex Therapist
"I review over 1,000 resumes each year, searching the globe for the most qualified couples therapists. It's remarkably hard to find exceptional talent. Many therapists (80%) believe they are already skilled at providing couples therapy.
The reality is alarming: less than 12% who claim to be "couples therapists" have taken even a single course in couples therapy. I look for certifications and specialized training before I hire, and a dedication to helping couples. Certifications mean proven skill."
We don't do generic, educationally-oriented group training for a crowd of couples. But there are many out there to choose from. Our work is 'one couple at a time.' And we learn as much as we can about you before you come. Your time will never be wasted in our face-to-face work.
We want you to be fully informed about the vast number of option available to you in a retreat format. The reason is simple: We believe we offer the best Couples Retreat available for moderately- to highly-distressed couples. These are designed to be life-changing, turn-around retreats, not generic advice. Ask for our six-paged Definitive Guide to Couples Retreats when you contact us.
Our Maryland / DC retreat with Angela Voegele is $3650. But this is not just a financial investment. We expect a lot from you. This includes the time and energy you'll devote to completing the online diagnostic evaluation we call: "The BIG BIG Book." We do our part, but you must also do yours to get the most out of this experience. If you aren't willing to put effort into this extensive assessment process, then we're not for you...
These retreats, run by expert psychologists and couples counselors, target particular couples:
We usually need 3 weeks lead time to allow you time to complete your BIG BIG Book. Contact us for "emergency" retreats.
You both need to complete your own version of The BIG BIG Book, and make travel and lodging accommodations (we'll send you our favorites...) The Berkshires is a vacation destination, so we encourage you to book early.
Absolutely. Call or email our office to schedule a mutually convenient time.
Not likely. Few insurance companies pay for couples therapy or couples retreats. However, Flexible Savings Accounts (FSA's) may. Ask your Accountant or Compensation and Benefits Administrator if you qualify for FSA's.
You can fly into Ronald Reagan National Airport. We're also about a 45 minute drive from Washington, D.C.
P.S. These couples retreats are in high demand and offered on a first come, first reserved basis. We can't hold your retreat without payment.
Could this make a huge difference in your relationship?
Don't put it off.
Contact us today to schedule a "Get Acquainted Phone Consult" with the Senior Clinician of your choice.