An Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat: A Get-Away for Couples

  • Are you lonely and wish you could reconnect sexually like you once did?
  • Are eve n affectionate gestures feeling forced and unnatural?
  • Are you "best of friends" but not really lovers anymore?

Considering a get-away Marriage Retreat?

A private, one-therapist/one couple gives you the space to really get to the bottom of why you aren't connecting​

Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat
Thank you for giving us a safe place to talk, cry, laugh and in my case, shut down. Our time spent with you has had a tremendous impact on our relationship and has helped us both take the time to reflect on what we need to focus on going forward.

Try an Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat.

Without a passionate bond, problems set in.  Attention from other people is sought out.  Angry fights result, driving you both even farther apart.

Do you find yourself losing sexual desire and "amusing" yourself in ways that threaten your loving marital bond? 

Consider a Sexuality Retreat. It also allows you to re-establish trust after an emotional affair, sexual affair or "sexting." liaison. We explore many of the following issues:

  • No sex or infrequent sex (less than 10 x a year)
  • Trauma-related sexual inhibition
  • Pornography use and hyperfocus
  • Problems in arousal or interest

This week-end includes plenty of time to cover issues related to sexuality and intimacy.

This Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat offers a private, individual session with you, as a couple and a highly trained professional.

Sexual discontent is a common problem in relationships. And a painful one.

Many assume sexual passion fades with long-term committed relationships.

That's a myth.

Read what one of my graduate students wrote about growing up in a household with parents in a passionate marriage:

I find that even the smallest experiences from my childhood impact who I am as a sexual being in adulthood. I believe in touch and affection...the way my parents showed love and affection. It is wonderful to live with parents who are deeply in love with one another, to know that they maintain a healthy sexual relationship within their marriage.

On the other hand, it makes one crave that kind of relationship all the more. I wanted to be desired and loved the way my parents did for each other."--- Assignment called "The Sexual Genogram" for Cambridge College in Dr. McMahon's class.

Student (printed with permission)
CCP680.01 Human Sexuality & Sex Therapy
I spent most of my marriage not knowing it could be as rich as this last month as been.

"Gleam Beams:" that affectionate gaze at one another with warm smiles.

There are no words to adequately express how grateful I am for the weekend my husband and I spent with you. You provided invaluable insight that, with time and practice, will help us navigate our marriage in a loving, supportive way. I walked away with so much hope, to the point of bursting with it. The concept of developmental trauma explains so much about the dynamics within our relationship, and still has us reeling when we think about the impact it has had..."
Life changing, earth shattering, amazing changes --- I am not kidding when I say this absolutely hands down saved our marriage, saved our lives... I was so unhappy and I am looking at the world differently, knowing I have a partner with me in this life that I once felt so alone in... We have a lot of work to do -- but we are both committed to this..."

How an Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat Works:

Sexuality is not seen as something disconnected from your relationship as a whole.

Far from it.

Instead, we integrate your relationship concerns, while allowing the time and space to work on common sexual issues. This includes a focus on low sexual desire, initiating and refusing sex, or problems related to sexual functioning. We'll apply the most advanced professional skills awarded to our therapists by those who practice sex therapy - AASECT.org

Format

All Full-Day Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat include two short breaks, and a break for lunch.

After you schedule your appointment, we provide you with a list of excellent restaurants and places to stay in the area.

You'll arrive at your hotel or bed and breakfast before our evening session.

"Lust isn't worth a damn, unless it is lust for life and for the moment.  A focus on what you DO rather than what you FEEL is a mistake most of the time..."

Couples Retreat Schedule

Friday Evening

6 pm - 8 pm

We start by discussing what issues are most important to each of you around sexuality. We'll discuss goals and an individual focus that makes the most sense to the two of you.

Saturday

9:30 am - 4:30 pm
  • What strengths and vulnerabilities do we bring to this marriage that works for or against it being more passionate?
  • What has happened in our early lives that have created problems for us emotionally and sexually?
  • How do we initiate or refuse sex with each other that causes pain?
  • How do we define "sex" in a way that is limiting and makes us unhappy?
  • What "Horsemen" do we reveal to each other that research shows results in break-ups? How do we change these?
  • Do we know how to calm ourselves down? Can we soothe each other?
  • Does sex stop when either of us becomes anxious, frustrated, or upset?
  • What role does pornography play in our difficulties connecting?
  • Does sex cause us to fight, instead of helping us to feel closer?
  • What specific actions we can take throughout the day to enhance our closeness and create a sexual and erotic environment?

Sunday

9:30 am - 4:30 pm

Here are a sampling of the types of issues we might work on during the second full days of the Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat:

  • Practicing productive dialogues about sex;
  • Working with destructive patterns of sexual and affectionate initiation/refusal;
  • Exploring early messages about bodies, eroticism, and relationships that dampen sexual excitement;
  • Stopping “The Four Horsemen” (Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt & Stonewalling) when they arise in sex;
  • Developing rituals of sexual connection;
  • Regulating and channeling anger productively.
  • Processing “regrettable incidents” and leaving the past behind.
  • Developing more compassionate ways to understand your partner sexually, and responding to their needs effectively.
  • Understanding your own emotional reactions to sex and how these impact your partner.
  • Understanding what causes “mechanical” feelings during sex.
  • Clinically proven techniques to treat ongoing sexual issues related to pain, arousal, erections, or orgasm difficulties.
  • Learning to continue intimate sharing when sexual issue arise during lovemaking;
  • Resolving difficulties when you and your partner have different sexual styles, and learning ways to make it work, despite those differences;
  • Healing problematic issues that exacerbate discrepant sexual desire;
  • Working with issues that contribute to an overall negative relationship climate.

How can we calm ourselves when things don't work well between us?

Contact Us for a No-Charge Consultation to learn more.

She gave us practical tools to use for when I was very upset which included meditation, favorite songs, my partner holding me tight (with a safe word if I did not want that), breathing devices and apps to download. We had struggled with much pain and anger and by the time we left we felt almost normal again with a new vision of our future and tools to use. She was extraordinarily easy to talk to and also has a nice sense of humor.
     I was skeptical heading into the weekend but now I am so glad that we did."

Erotic touch is key to passionate lovemaking.

Most couples feel relieved and hopefulness after this intensive couples sexuality retreat.

Our goal is to enhance your intimate relating in a calm and respectful atmosphere.

Collaborative, Cooperative, Fun!

The way sexuality is supposed to be. We know sexual problems can be an extremely painful issue for a couple.  We get that. This work is designed to allow you to open up, share deeply, and feel safety in exploring your sexual selves.

"Passion includes a willingness to open to sensations, and to examine why we're not.  It's a personal journey, as well as a relationship interaction."

Follow-up

Two nights are just not adequate to apply what you've learned in these two and one half days. That is why you are provided with two additional one hour, 20 minute sessions, to allow you time to process and consolidate your learning. The first usually occurs two to six weeks after your intensive, and at regular intervals after this. You are also offered special rates for up to 10 additional online sessions, if you desire them, to solidify your learning.

These sessions take place in the comfort of your own home through a confidential videoconferencing program used in telemedicine throughout the world.

Common Emotions following the Intensive Couples Sex Therapy Retreat:

As a result of this first session, you may feel a sense of relief about the opportunity to move through the issues that brought you to us. However, these intensives may also stir up uncomfortable emotions such as guilt, sadness, anger, loneliness or helplessness. Long-standing sexual problems between couples need both time, patience, and goodwill. There may be other issues, such as chronic fighting, affairs, addictions, or deep seated trauma histories that need to be worked on before you'll see dramatic results. Sexuality has to be considered more than an act.  It is a whole host of issues including body image, confidence, trust, commitment, and early life experience that contribute to healthy sexual functioning.  These feelings and issues typically arise, and may even feel exaggerated before you acquire both insight and the courage to change.

These Intensive Couples Therapy Retreats are not suitable for couples the following situations:

  • When there is an undiagnosed physical medical concern. We encourage all couples to have a complete urological or gynecological exam prior to attending. This is especially true when pain or other physical illness could be impacting sexual functioning. Or when on SSRI antidepressant medication.
  • When one is in an undisclosed, ongoing, or recent affair;
  • When one partner suffers from a current active addiction;
  • If there is ongoing violence, or threats of violence by either spouse;
  • If there is an untreated mental illness. ~This particularly includes suicidal or homicidal thoughts, or a history of serious harm you've done to yourself or another person.

If you have a mental health condition which is currently stable and/or in remission, you are welcome to participate in this form of treatment.

Contact us if you have questions or concerns about these issues.

Give our Intake Coordinator,  Daniel a call:  (yes, it works. click it...)

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